Divorce, why? It is common now to experience your parents sitting you down and telling you they are getting a divorce. Despite their best efforts it is usually going to cause you a lot of upset and grief. You may tho ugh be relieved because it has stopped all the arguments and now your parents are getting on a lot better. You may be constantly trying to get them back together. Whatever you feel during and after a divorce, these pages are designed to give you support and help you through this difficult time. Why Have They Split Up? Divorce has become much more common now not just because more people are realising they should not have got married but also because a divorce has become a lot easier to obtain particularly in the last 20 years. It is also much more acceptable than it used to be. People tend to realise that there are reasons why married couples would want to split. A common cause is money problems. In modern times, the standard of living has increased so people want to keep up with this by having more possess ions. This means working harder and for longer hours, leaving less time for a family life. If not enough time is being spent with a partner it can be very hard to keep a relationship going. Sometimes both people in the relationship realise that they made a mistake when marrying each other. This could be because they meet someone else and fall in love with them or because once they rushed to get married and once they got down to the everyday business of living together they realised they were not the right people for each other. When children are involved in a divorce, it is as difficult for them as it is for the couple involved. It is possible that if your parents get divorced you may look for a reason for their break up particularly if it is sudden. You may even end up blaming yourself. You may feel like you made their lives more difficult or that you could have helped around the house or tried to behave more. It is not your fault that your parents have broken up and there is nothing you could have done to stop this divorce. There may be lots of reasons for the break up but you are not one of them. It is also not going to help if you behave exceptionally well now. It may make your parents feel better but it is not going to get them back together. It is difficult but as time goes on you will learn to accept that they are no longer a couple. They may no longer love each other but it is important to remember that they still love you.
-Josie
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